Not only Steve Kim is putting FOOKs on people these days. All of NC wants a FOOK
Tim Weable filling two holes with some unsolicited Arizona love, and I didn’t even get deported.
AZ Wilderness will pull your card.
Stoked to try that ba saison as well.
Fantome Brise Bon bons, letting the chope rest and putting mileage on that white ghostulip.
That notorious 2013 latex has metabolized off and tastes more akin to the faded ass alpha hops in something like the grassiness of a 2010 Grat. The rest of the beer is phenomenal, caramel and bright lemon grass melds nicely with Belgian esters and a jazz apple finish.
Be sure to not tell anyone else about this, it will be our ghost secret l.
These Insta-Rones pop a Jester King and think they the realist saison tickers on the block, but they J’s is fake and they don’t know about that ghost game
Bedspread comments forthcoming.
Zero comments about the actually bottles because most basic bitch tickers don’t even know what those are.
@therarebarrel Ensorcelled versus @thebruery Wanderer, LET’S FINALLY PUT THESE COMPARISONS TO REST
Alright, whenever I bring up the dark sour lineage from Rare Barrel, some dipshit wants 1) demonstrate he knows that Jay Goodwin worked at the Bruery and 2) flex his peen and let everyone know that he has had Wanderer. At the Bruery anniversary festival, all I fucking heard was chortled comparisons from the sweaty jowls of attendees about “ERMAGERD ITS…basically…the…same…Wandere…” which I assumed was a comparison, since that “standing in direct sunlight” must have taken a lot of out the husky attendees.
So let’s settle this shit. Which one is better? Is there a difference? Can you approximate a vagina with a lukewarm cantaloupe? These questions answered today.
RESULTS INVALID: no Rare Barrel Glass utilized, unfair advantage from the outset
The Rare Barrel Ensorcelled
Berkeley, California, United States
Style | ABV
American Wild Ale | 5.80% ABV
“Dark Sour Beer Aged in Oak Barrels with Rasperries” laconic as fuck.
VERSUS
The Bruery THE WANDERER
California, United States
Style | ABV
American Wild Ale | 8.00% ABV
Notes/Commercial Description:
The Wanderer is a special blend of oak aged ales that we made with Craig and Beth from San Francisco’s City Beer Store. Blending a mix of sour ales and our anniversary ale the base of this beer has a delightfully sour tinge on top of a hearty malt backbone. To add to the flavor, Craig and Beth selected blackberries and bing cherries to be added to the ale adding to it’s already fruity complexity. This ale went on to win the silver medal for wood & barrel aged sour fruited ales at the 2011 Great American Beer Festival.
Alright enough cyber sexing, let’s bring this resolution to full completion:
A: Them Berkeley boys come out the gates with a slicker and more nimble offering that has more substantial carb and deeper darker tones serving to underpin the frothy mochawhip carbonation. The Rare Barrel offering LOOKS outright more attenuated and seems to straddle more genres in appearance than the paint by numbers AWA you may be expecting. By contrast Wanderer has deep garnet and ROBEY-esque tones with burnt sienna, dark amber and red brick frothiness in the head that seems more focused and calls to the fruits from within to harness their tannic nature like an acidic Captain Planet, unity through divested parts.
WINRAR: Wanderer, I just wanna get my mouth all up on that burnt red lipstick, red rocket session.
If you thought I was gonna go for some low hanging euphemism here you are wrong, and your vagina is dry.
S: Ensorcelled puts forward an amazing, stripped down approach that is a decidedly jammy, raspberry banger that adds nuance and a level of complexity with caramel, toasted creme brulee top, almond, and an acidic closer that doesn’t toe the line into acetic. It knows the limits and pats co-workers on the low back, doesn’t grip their acidic asses. Wanderer, for all its charms is more like a RT Dodge Challenger in this regard and deliver MOARRRRR acidity, but with substantially less poise and grace. The fruit is there and you get almost a touch of Oud Bruin in there with a black cherry and currant appeal, however, there are sick burnout slicks tossing almost vinegar and acetic notes from overclocking that sour processor. For novice sour lovers, this will hit harder and light up their erogenous zones more completely, but if someone has been in that jammy jam game for a while, they will likely prefer Ensorcelled for its subtle wit and slow approach, like neck misses and an Oscar Wilde novel while Newsroom is on in the background.
WINRAR: Ensorcelled, because that slow palm up the inner berry thigh, straight juicy clearances.
T: Ensorcelled builds upon the nasal endeavors in much the same way, a dry tart opener with ratcheted acidic aspects, just enough to let the fruit shine through. It’s like in death metal breakdowns when the double kick pulls back to let those face melting hammer ons through, that’s how things progress with this delicate face melter. You get that framboise meets brown ale sort of execution, like walnut and caramel but covered in Smucker’s jammy goodness. The acidity compliments and doesn’t dominate the gentle fruit tannins. Wanderer has been doing sick dips and the acidic serratus is shredded, at full berry pump. The blackberry is present in the taste in a huge way and those tart cherries come through not unlike C&C old school La Folie. Which is ironic because Rare Barrel would be the low hanging La Folie comparison, I know, FOR OBVIOUS REASONS. However, with great power comes great acidity, Uncle Ben taught me that. The red wine vinegar notes are only present at higher temps and there is a touch of diacetyl if you sip this at room temperature. It’s more like if you are the consumer who buys the reasonable 2 cup Reese’s or if you go malty balls to the wall with a straight up 4 CUP session. I am not here to tell you how to live your life.
WINRAR: Wanderer, while more aggressive, your palate secretly likes its hair pulled by them blackberries.
Put these beers inside your buddies, get wild, touch his malty monkey
M: Ensorcelled is more of a gentle fawn, presenting a nice berry basket of jams and welcoming you to the neighborhood. Wanderer walks right into your housewarming party and starts gripping your cousin’s titties and shes not even of age yet. The dryness of Wanderer is over the top and the acidity is that type of hegemony that some prefer because it lets the palate relax as the dominate notes are apparent. Bitch level cicerones will prefer Wanderer because they can point out pronounced aspects to their home brew club and feel like they don’t have an eraser dick. However, Ensorcelled has that poise and grace of the incredibly attractive mormon girl that everyone can appreciate and we all respect for her values and nuanced airs. Sure she isn’t tossing dome shots in the backseat of a Dodge Inrepid, but maybe you will like Rare Barrel more as a result, for taking that higher road and not just gripping your berries outright.
WinRARER: Encsorcelled, the ethereal feel of a CTR ring in your soft palm carries the day.
D: Ensorcelled is as soft as the Charmin bear and equally loveable, You can drink it before a Wake and no one will be all JUDGEY. Wanderer is more of a solo commitment. It demands more, it provides more, but compels all the same maintenance problems attendant with those extremes. Your jaw will hurt, you will be drunker, you will be more fatigued, like performing cunnilingus for minutes on end with a girl who is out of your league. But is the pain worth it? I cannot answer that for you, but to my own sensibilities, I enjoyed the frolic in the berry patch with the modest company of the berry hued sorceress. That doesn’t mean you wont like paying top dollar to get your blackberries stepped on. Hell some people pay a ton for that. It just comes down to preference in that regard and I prefer my berries intact.
WinRurerercellor: Tie for drinkability. Just depends on your tolerance and personal tastes.
AMERICAN SOURS ARE TEH ANTCHRIST. Belgiums only!11!!!!
OVERALL WINNER: Ensorcelled. Something needs to be said for the nuanced and stripped down approach to this baby bunny in the dark sour patch. While both are equally compelling, my personal tastes align more with this end of the Goldilocks spectrum. Both are exceptional beers, all that bullshit beer blog guarded language, etc, but Ensorcelled is better. I don’t think Patrick Rue is gonna lose any sleep over these 1210 words, plus I am a shameless Bruery apologist, remember.
You guys tonight I made a ultra Baltic porter coovee and jacked it to ask.fm Wait wut
Ok so aside from barely legal
1. Coffee
2. Cacao nut
3. Vanilla
4. Base
5 pb and j
There you go. Ground breaking jurisprudence. All are worthy of your attention and MA traders are crazy generous with such a top tier beer.
Sometimes it get tiring servicing whales all the time. So trill.
De Cam Kriek Lambiek, cherry poppin daddy go an blow your horn
I prefer the Oude kriek but this is still a nice little maraschino cherry with a faint tannic aspect that is less juicy but more drinkable. The carbonation is fantastic and has this crackly pop rocks disposition that is a cherry will O the wisp that regenerates with one cherry mana. It gains complexity as it warms with more of a Capri sun and red jolly rancher sweetness and only the faintess hint of acidity. As a result it feels more traditional and makes this less initiated feel at home. This is a more subtle albeit more nuanced cherry profile that some will find boooooring but others who don’t watch “say yes to the dress” will realize it takes a calm hand and cherry smooches to blend something this balanced and crushable.
Them cherries get my banana peeled
Last night I popped an Allagash Merveilleux while playing Demon’s Souls. This is an excellent beer to enjoy in between the relentless YOU DIED messages.
This is a refreshing albeit substantial American wild or AMERICAN AUTHENTIC LAMBIC as the joke goes. It has a nice dry crispness to the nose like strawberry and fresh cut Fuji apples, and the dryness follows throughout the mouthfeel with Chardonnay and a white grape fruitiness to it at the outset. After you swallow things get a touch earthier not unlike the mineral and lightly bitter 2010 cable car or Herfst sort of metallic meets acidic merger. The whole thing kinda reminds me of an imperial Supplication on one hand and a sort of earthy wild on another.
Worth arching a couple ropes of jizz over but not your entire load, if we are talking backdoor trades.
When it comes to rare bottles, you always gotta go with plan ZJ
DARK HORSE NATION: FINALLY the mash-tun cleaning antics TV viewers have been demanding all these years
In case you haven’t heard yet, them old bearded boys of Marshall, Michigan went and done acquired themselves a television show, on the history channel no less. That’s right, for both of you at home who couldn’t get enough of BREWDAWGZ and BREWMASTERS, comes DARK HORSE NATION, a thrilling new TV series chronicling the lives of Michigan brewers attempting to address the stark solipisms of the human condition by running water through crunched up grains. TRULY COMPELLING.
In the fourth episode, VALENTINES HORSE, one of the bearded boys needs to woo a female companion out of her Lane Bryant jumper
You may be asking, “what in the fuck does this have to do with history?” Well technically any event recorded in a static medium is HISTORY, so even minutia connected to making SOUR THREE GUYS OFF THE SCALE, is technically historically relevant because it happened in the not-future. Listen, I am no Don Draper, so I will let History Channel give you their spin on this pile of spent grain:
“”In small town Marshall, Michigan, there is a group of life-long friends living out their visions of the American dream. Led by rebel entrepreneur and fearless visionary, Aaron Morse, Dark Horse is a thriving business set amongst a rural paradise. Morse and his team have been making a name for themselves since 1997, when Dark Horse started bottling their unique line of craft beers. Now distributed in 12 states, the Dark Horse crew is determined to turn their business into a household name. It’s diehard fan base even has its own nickname: Dark Horse Nation.”
“However, DARK HORSE NATION is not only about crafting great beer, it’s a way of life. Their recipe for success is as much about experimentation and trouble-shooting as it is self-taught skill and determination. Every week, there’s some new project, from creating outlandish inventions to building additions to their ever-growing compound. Around here, everything is done by hand, the old-fashioned way, or as they like to put, ‘The Dark Horse Way.'”
So TL;DR the first paragraph is essentially an advertisement for Dark Horse. That’s fine, I guess. The second paragraph delves into existential territory and shows you the raw pathos of the show, THE DARK HORSE WAY OF LIFE. This tao of pouring sacks of two row melded with the Vedas of pitching buckets of yeast underpins the SOUL OF THEIR EVER GROWING COMPOUND. At a certain point, when your size 40 husky jeans chafe from the Michigan sun, you reach that third stage of Kierkegaardian development: THE DARKHORSE WAY.
This is how I feel when I get requests from people to talk about fucking BREWDOGZ or whatever show DFH Sam is pandering at the moment.
But seriously, what in the fuck is this show actually about? Surely they can’t fill up seven episodes with dipshits wearing North Face jackets arguing about the Lions, OR CAN THEY. Here is my episode breakdown of predictable and tired pseudo-reality plot points:
Episode 1 “MEET THEM HORSES” in this episode we meet four dudes with beards and watch them race against interspliced shots of a clock for some reason, and then we get a B plotline where two husky keg washers have a dispute about who sprayed muds on whose S10.
Episode 2 “TRAVELING HORSES” in this episode two bearded dudes pile into a Tacoma and look for like vanilla, or razzleberry or some shit for an upcoming beer. It really isn’t that important but expect minor chords played over a dude looking winsomely at a barrel like “MAN IF THEY DONT GET THEM BURRIES IN TIME WE ARE FIXIN FOR A REAL SITCH!” Also, we meet a female support character who is probably latently degrading.
Episode 3 “EXPANDING THAT HORSE” in this pivotal TWO PART episode we explore the finer points of basic construction, putting brite tanks in place, and some bullshit ticking clock about how CROOKED TREE NEEDS TO START BREWIN OTHERWISE THE MICHIGAN CHOPPER SOCIETY WONT HAVE ANY KEGS. Also Danzig might show up for some reason.
When they cut to commercial, expect some PAWN STARS bullshit facts like “Dark Horse Brewing is located at 511 S. Kalamazoo Ave., just south of downtown Marshall. The location was formerly Wacky Willy’s party store, owned and named after Bill Morse.” The types of facts you can bring up in case you need to avoid ever feeling a vagina.
the episode “Bring your illegitimate child to the brewery” was nominated for several emmays
Let’s be honest, I am just butthurt that CONDOLAMBIC: the Future Rustic Adventure, was not greenlighted. Just a dude trying to decide what type of DME to use, going to Ralph’s for frozen burritos and then siphoning HOA poolwater before the manager finds out. At one point, the crew has to sit and wait while a Daredorm episode is assiduously selected. Moving television.
Allagash got me poppin a musky Tiarna right now, small format :(
Of all the exceptional Allagash offerings, this would be the midline Yoshi of the AmericanLambiKart world. It isn’t as musky and couple as the cool ships it isn’t as tart as FV13, it doesn’t have that stellar red wine vinegar meets butryic acid profile of Vagabond: it is just crushable and delicious.
Somewhere between the acidic Beat and gentle Sanctification is this highly drinkable delicious treat. You get a touch of dough, lemon grass, some peach musk, ratcheted back acidity and this soapy carbonation like a Church car wash and- seriously how are they allowed to wear that it’s for a church.
This may not be “worth” the price point given the fact that you will decimate it within minutes, but isn’t that what nuanced execution is about? That American wild ale that provides a release so subtle you don’t even realize it until you are cleaning your browser history and trying to google how to get precum off of suede? That’s what beer is about.
Posting hard on that Subbydoo life
dontdrinkbeer 