Goose Island sent me this bcbw for WRITTEN REVIEW PURPOSES ONLY. So this bottle will receive an extremely favorable review, obvi. I have already purchased my own BCBW for attention seeking bullshit video purposes, which is separate and distinct from this $0.00 paid review. The bcbw I muddle with Good n Plenties is NOT this bottle, as this is the WRITTEN IMPRESSIONS bottle. Receiving any donation is a de facto payment and every brewery automatically receives glowing impressions, DDB IS THAT ACCESSIBLE. [fn1] Not sure how much more heavy-handed I can be with this caption. Dudes with 9th grade reading comprehension will still complain and get back to Say Cheese and Die with a furrowed brow. #barleywine #bil #barleywineislife #shitstorm
BREAKING NEWS: Armand drops by Jester King and SLAYS. Late last night, Armand set down a lambic pitcher and delivered a 60 bar freestyle that fucking shattered this guy who was talking shit on Zwet.be. A husky Austin onlooker noted, “the Americans thought Stuffings would just walk in there, spit a 16 or two,and sew up Méthode Gueuze for us. Deep down though, the Belgians knew Armand had fuckin’ BARS.” You could hear a bung drop when the crushing phillipic concluded. “Honestly, they were lucky to walk out of there with Tradionelle.” More details as they develop.
Let’s just get this out of the way at the outset, Fremont Brew 2000 is a complete masterpiece and exists as evidence of the pinnacle of what the Barleyrealm is capable of. If you give this to a friend and they still dont like it, their palate is broken. Sell them for scrap. Their tastebuds will not pass smog and their subjective impressions are a total loss. This is damn near ale perfection rely upon no CGI, just all practical barrel effects. It is straight up Maris Otter and Carafa at their finest, cream of wheat with a dollop of brown sugar in the center. Gristy shattered creme brulee shell, a flawlessly nimble body that imparts waves of layered flavor you can examine like a caramel geode. As it warms that muddy haze subsides and reveals prune and fig reduction. The barrel is this overseeing parole officer making sure the oaky notes hold the sweetness in line, piss tests and firearm searches adminstered liberally. Finally the swallow is this long, drawn out affair with Almond Roca dipped into Michter’s bourbon. You can easily take this bomber down and then think longingly to that one sweet tryst, like the kid who allegedly got his dick sucked, always seemingly at some unconfirmable location like summer camp or on a cruise. Those kinda memories.
Take that glorious majesty, and then completely fucking ruin it, and you have the Peated version. PB2K makes zero sense. it is an exercise in self-harm and in light of the pure magnificence of the regular version, it feels like the beer version of a book burning. It is disturbing on many levels, It has this gagging Speyside aspect dominating the malts, this chalky “bubble tape after the flavor is gone” that dehydrates and leaves a lingering balloon flavor. Overworked clowns have not tasted this much latex and char. It is a resounding disappointment and feels like in movies when oh no way the government makes a super soldier and oh no shit it turns on them. Terroir science has gone way too far. This isn’t just bad by contrast, this falls in a dazzling Icarian way to earth, without redemption. The waxiest of wings turn to tire aisle and dentist’s glove.
Drank some skid row haze to cleanse the palate on Collab day during that 6 hour boil.
I’m not gonna get too crazy and say this on some @liveoakbrewing level, but god damn this is one of the best hefs that I have ever had. Like Live Oak, this transcends a usually hohum style that is a punchline to beer nerd condescension, taking it to a refreshing frothy complexity. Not just good relative to the style, exceptional when considered globally across all beers. Sure there’s some banana tonez but it’s incredibly drinkable with tempered hop profile in the distant background, lightly phenolic, and a spiced orange Julius swallow. I had like ten people tel me about this beer before trying it but this seemed wayyyyy out of the @3floydsbrewing wheelhouse, but they juiced my rind with this Bavarian banger. Absolutely grab this if possible.
Mashing upstream, BIL maintains against the grain. This bottle straight up has #bil on the label and it carries that appellation fittingly. This is a weird sticky hybrid of all their other awesome life adjacent moves in the marketplace. This cuvée is not flabby at all and exhales fig pudding, raisins, Beam cask, carb is minimal but lays there like a highly competent plum escort. Swallow has a degree of raisinettes but is watery than expected and leads to dangerous “oh shit did i leave that in the freezer last night” type of malfeasance. It’s derivative to their other also amazing offerings and even sitting down to reconfirm the excellence is tiring, it’s like, fuck up more often at least @jackieosbrewery and make my life a little easier. No one is trying to read praise through gnashed teeth. #BIL
I don’t know if @littlecottagebrewery is licensed or still technically glorified home brew but, suffice it to say, this is very good. The bottles look like some janky Kuhnhenn Avery label shit but the contents bangs. Awesome sustain and frothy Honduran foam party carb, with a distinctive paper thin saison base tryna hold it all together. It ends up with its little 4.5% frame tryna snatch way too much but presses the fruit character magnificently, and that’s all you really need is fruity snatch. It’s water and peach jolly ranchers with a smattering of gristy acidity like the second runnings version of a Casey Family Preserves, how a small operation pulled this off is flummoxing, but I hope they can continue when scaled up because this degree of attention to detail is tightly woven like nanas needlepoint. The stone fruit character is like apricot leather, tons of minerality like the beer was sparged with Grapefruit La Croix. Great stuff from a relative nobody in the game, curious to see if they can continue to satisfy beyond 4.5 stonefruit pumps. 🍆 🍑 💦
Dah da da dah dah da dah dah DAH DAH DA. LETS GO. It’s not easy making a name for yourself, but @jackieosbrewery has magnificently dominated the strong ale game by releasing cost effective, accessible, god tier gems spanning stouts and life adjacent barleybangers. Half a decade ago I pointed out the disparity between the likes of Oil of Aphrodite and the anomalously shitty Funky Southpaw. Over the years I outright avoided their sour program and just figured it was a case of Kuhnhenitis, it’s ok to be extremely good at one thing. You ever meet someone who is hella good at something? They’re usually unbalanced AF and ultra literal. Flash forward to present day and here’s babbling brook, a no frills ba saison. Get this: it goes in hard in the paint. Increasingly the awa acidity arms race has subverted saisons, but this subtle gem is pillowy soft, feathery lemon goose down, key lime and prickly mouthfeel. I suspect my bottle had a cap issue because some of the carb is lacking but it’s aberrant for this brewery so I dunno blame it on me I guess. The swallow has this lavender and lemon yoplait thing I enjoy. It’s this understated Nathan for You excellence that isn’t a TryHard ale that can solicit actual cringes. It’s silent and tender, prolly won’t solicit a right swipe but exists in that Coffee date realm that warms your farmhouse heart.