Dah da da dah dah da dah dah DAH DAH DA. LETS GO. It’s not easy making a name for yourself, but @jackieosbrewery has magnificently dominated the strong ale game by releasing cost effective, accessible, god tier gems spanning stouts and life adjacent barleybangers. Half a decade ago I pointed out the disparity between the likes of Oil of Aphrodite and the anomalously shitty Funky Southpaw. Over the years I outright avoided their sour program and just figured it was a case of Kuhnhenitis, it’s ok to be extremely good at one thing. You ever meet someone who is hella good at something? They’re usually unbalanced AF and ultra literal. Flash forward to present day and here’s babbling brook, a no frills ba saison. Get this: it goes in hard in the paint. Increasingly the awa acidity arms race has subverted saisons, but this subtle gem is pillowy soft, feathery lemon goose down, key lime and prickly mouthfeel. I suspect my bottle had a cap issue because some of the carb is lacking but it’s aberrant for this brewery so I dunno blame it on me I guess. The swallow has this lavender and lemon yoplait thing I enjoy. It’s this understated Nathan for You excellence that isn’t a TryHard ale that can solicit actual cringes. It’s silent and tender, prolly won’t solicit a right swipe but exists in that Coffee date realm that warms your farmhouse heart.

For the steep price tag and ultra rarity, this bottle didn’t punchdown my grapes. When consumed cold the sharp acidity of this is pronounced and gumline receding, slightly buttery chard tones, French oak, a dry waxy tangerine rind closer to it like a filthier temptation. I let this sit on the counter while I watched Over the Top, trying to figure out Stallones relationship to his dying wife and his confusing son, came back an hour later. It had improved markedly when consumed at Life temps in the low 60s. Acidity gave way to more pineapple and jazz apple, oak was a sort of cidery warmth to the swallow, a totally different beer. Drank cold this was 2 arms wrestling trophies out of five. Drank more tepid it jumped to four valvoline cans out of five. I signed away the rights to custody to my child so I could arm wrestle. Everyone learned something that day.

@boulevard_beer has always had feet dangling in the barley tidepool with life adjacent gems like BBBQ and rye on rye just dripping rolo and oak off the shelves. Now we get to the main Life event at the Kumite and they have throw a touch of grain in the consumers eyes, but remain poised. People have asked me whether this is English or American in execution and the answer is a resounding ABSOLUTELY. Basically they took the sweet heft and classic cling of that U.K. Sweet treat and the brash coniferous hopping schedule of its NASCAR counterparts and here we are. This is a style bender to be sure and while confusing, it works on several levels. The rolo and skor bar is almost snuffed out under substantial cut pine and tanned leather, but in tandem they work. If the average dipshit consumer only has access to ho hum intensely hopped American barleywines then this will give a more accurate appraisal of the limits and capacity of the genre. Essentially, duvel may win converts to the often neglected god tier style, by presenting something less than a cord of firewood on the palates driveway. The massive distro coupled with the sheer quality is a huge win for the Life movement at large. However, this is more of a prequel to the real victory: the barrel-aged version of this that is no doubt forthcoming. The strong Hop presence will give it a Grat fortitude of indefatigablility to survive the cask and temper any sweetness. This will not disappoint and even greater things are coming down that malty luggage carousel, have your barleyclaim in hand.

Those fellas at @bissellbrothers sure are sweet, usually when I hear “whale pod” it’s those damn ultimate frisbee jocks making fun of me and my stepson at the water park. Elaborate ass box and an adorable card, how nice and thoughtful, Maine people are basically Canadians with Stephen King instead of the universal health care

Listen sure @revbrewchicago makes some good stuff but can we all be earnest with ourselves and admit that putting these and their other massive barrel aged beers in cans is nothing short of apeshit negligence? Like what good can come from this? I can’t remember a time when someone needed a world class stout except on the go in a tidy portable container. Selling these in four packs is even more reckless because the connotation is that the serving size is basically whatever the night/early morning holds. Throw a couple of these in your fanny pack and hit the extreme frisbee course all khaki mouthed. Also, just because a brewery puts coffee in a massive stout does not mean you can drink it at sunrise. The presence of bean is not a commutation of responsible behavior. We all know it’s not possible to get a DUI when the sun is up, sure, but people are gonna keep these cans in the cooler at work and listen I don’t need my Hertz rental car agent reeking of cherry stouts. Maybe my hookah hostess. It’s just gonna set a dangerous new precedent and invariably these are gonna go to pint then stovepipe then full on pounders making the canned ba Grat seem downright reasonable. I’m not mad, I just know I eventually want to have children and between canned massive beers and the cost of tuition I’m just scared is all.

Some malty love from @jackieosbrewery. Love that #BIL nod on the cellar cuvée label. And stoked to try the secret secret blank bottle and report back. Their barleygame is of the highest caliber, toffee exit wounds are substantial. I have always ragged on their sour and wild game since the Funky South Paw but this ba mixed germ saison legit looks awesome. It will be fun to see how they have developed over the past years. And I guess the double barrel apparition is pretty okay too I suppose 🍞 🍷 👌

@boulevard_beer now makes cider, maybe they always have (?) but this shit has the nutritional facts on it in front of god and everyone. I am furtively praying that they don’t extend this self-realizing info to their barleywines and big ales, my self esteem cannot take it.

At a certain point the @thealeapothecary wilds are getting to this insane depth that it feels like stimulation overload. I sometimes worry that drinking farmhouse beers with this much musk and funk and acidity and obscure produce will deaden my ability to feel things in a meaningful way. Everyone has the friend who pushed it too far with porn early on and now has to watch Motherless links behind five proxies just to get the needle to move. Everyone knows rum peach la tache is arguably top five best awa ever made. This is more acidic and less delicate but it drives a monolithic ship of oak and leather and a frothy wispy V shaped wake of tangerine acidity on the swallow. It’s drier than British humor but imparts a gruyere and Granny Smith closer that feels oddly comforting. People can laugh at the sky high prices of these bottles but, those are the same value hunting dipshits who will buy Cascade bottles or watch whatever is free on Crackle. This is exceptional if a touch too GERD inducing in longer exposure. At any rate, a treat to share and each one of these new AA joints has imparted a zenith of sensory shattering fun. Brb setting up four proxies to find deep web urethral sounding feeds.

This was a massive gusher and the cork was butterflied from saturation and carbonic acid, but once it settled down it drank like some intensely cultured Biere de garden back blended with a pillowy soft Alexander. 250 bottles and insane fruit profile means I’ll never see this one again but god damn was it a treat.

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Is lagerwine life? It’s certainly life adjacent and has all of the phylum and genus taxonomy of a living entity but something is slightly amiss. That warmth like a skor bar blankie fresh from the dryer is conspicuously absent and in its place is a fusel warmth and fabric quality on par with old navy. You’ll run this unbalanced beast into the ground, but if you’re laying drywall do you really want some hefty complex apparel? It’s thin and distinctively lager strain but lacks the world class brute strength in the ba eisbock realm [kuhnhenn luvubb] but still has a clean swallow albeit a tolerable heat on par with watery ass basil Haden’s looking at the big boy bookers doing dead lifts. It’s solid but there’s many for reals bbbws that will lay you down like sheet rock with more depth and cling. I’d still toss on Space Jam and smash this raw dog.