Image
0

Oso/Funk Factory Scarlett Letter, pouring Levi Funk beers in a Bruery glass. Classic.

20140312-200052.jpg

Just look at them rosey times. Beautiful beer, frothy Lisa Frank binder magenta foam.

A: very acidic nose, but more of a gentler lactic than Cascade, but bolder than traditional Belgian offerings. Ripe strawberry, light potpourri, balaton cherries and cranberry skins.

Taste is slightly less than the multifaceted approach in the nose, but exceedingly refreshing. Tart but not overly acidic, intense cranberry that washes clean and dry with a bone thin Callista Flockhart body.

Closer hits the gumline and delivers ripe berries, raspberry fruit snacks, and lingering acidity.

The name of the game is crushability, this moves swift and goes down faster than a DG. Nothing goes down faster than a cranberry anchor.

4

Blue Lobster Is Suing DDB, Wait No, They Are Using the Bootleg Labels Instead, Wait so am I sued?

|

Ok so if you follow DDB, you may remember a while back I reviewed a bunch of “Blue Lobster” items from the “THEN” brewer David Sakolsky. The bottles were unlabeled QC bottles of homebrew that weren’t technically Blue Lobster beers, based on my understanding. They looked like this:

Puns abound. Note, there is no reference to Blue Lobster on the label.

So in a behind the scenes that I didn’t want to go into, the now former brewer, David got in deep shit for sending me bottles of his homebrew. This is a nuanced IP discussion for a forum not as nuanced as the internet minge that is Dontdrinkbeer. So at that time, the owner of Blue Lobster intimated that he was going to sue DDB for what I can only assume libel (?) or misappropriation of company property (?) trespass to chattels (?) defamation per se (?) for posting pictures referencing Blue Lobster beer with “fake” labels.

Here is one such label that may have poised the Blue Lobster owner to sue poor old DDB:

This was the beer that I drank the night that old Subbydoo was banned from BA. Must have been the ABV.

So anyway, that label rustled that jim jameses, because I noted that it was brewed by Blue Lobster, which at the time the owner was alleging, if I understand it 1) did not want it to be identified by that fake label OR 2) that it was not an “actual” Blue Lobster beer.

Fast forward 6 months and David Sakolsky has since been fired. Now Blue Lobster has announced that they are releasing this:

MY IP HAS BEEN STOLEN.

“Hobbie” is a pejorative for sexually promiscuous Hobbits. Fantasy hate speech.

Well it looks like old DDB finally realized its dream of designing labels for breweries. So I am confused as hell, and don’t want to get sued. DDB was never officially contacted by the owner of Blue Lobster nor any counsel connected thereto, so maybe I am just completely misinformed and the owner of Blue Lobster is just a huge DDB fan. Who knows? someone with journalistic integrity should ask him.

So did Blue Lobster release David’s homebrew as a “real” Blue Lobster beer, despite disavowing it just 6 months ago? Or was this a Blue Lobster beer all along and I accidentally provided the springboard for the label?

I don’t know. I just don’t feel like getting sued. My Daredorm and Myfreecamsgirls accounts are already expensive enough as it is.

4

Official Glassware Information Just in Time for St. Patricks’ Day Thanks to RedEnvelope.com

|

Dontdrinkbeer.com has really been fucking things up in the past. It seems like this website just cannot get its shit together and use proper glassware.

A mug for a saison? Nice website you glassware fuckup.

A mug for a saison? Nice website you glassware fuckup.

Well thankfully, someone over at the retail and gift outlet, RedEnvelope.com, reached out to old DDB and provided an infographic to finally clear this shit up so that I can stop misleading my readers, teaching them to drink out of plastic BRIDE goblets and shit. Be thankful this retail store saved your ass, think how red your face would be drinking green Coors light OUT OF THE WRONG GLASS LOL

YOU ARE WELCOME

YOU ARE WELCOME

Now I know someone will invariably object “Hey this post is completely fucked, the nice people at RedEnvelope were just trying to reach out to you and give you some free information for your users.” That would be a salient point if it weren’t completely fucking wrong. Redenvelope doesn’t give a fuck about DDB, its readers or otherwise. In fact, this same entity reached out to several other beer blogs indiscriminately with the same “HI BLOG TEAM!” introductory line, with zero fucks to give about the sites they are reaching out to. I wouldn’t care so much about blatant spam but the second line proudly declares “WE LOVE THE WORK YOU ARE DOING ON YOUR BLOG. WE ARE BIG FANS!” That’s funny, because I have never received a single referral link from their retail website, and they certainly must be big fans of a shitload of beer blogs if the number of people who received this same email is any indication.

Furthermore, if RedEnvelope were actually a fan of DDB, they would know just how much my readers would appreciate such an infographic. These are the same type of degenerates who drink barleywines out of flower pots. As if that weren’t enough, I posted this photo

Redenvelope #1 DDB fan

Redenvelope #1 DDB fan

and they clearly still did not look at the site and still were on board for letting me advertise their wares on my site. Super stoked for the ill-gotten free traffic.

So as promised, go here and buy some generic glassware from my #1 fan, RedEnvelope: http://www.redenvelope.com/beer-gifts-RBEER