Dontdrinkbeer.com has really been fucking things up in the past. It seems like this website just cannot get its shit together and use proper glassware.

A mug for a saison? Nice website you glassware fuckup.

Well thankfully, someone over at the retail and gift outlet, RedEnvelope.com, reached out to old DDB and provided an infographic to finally clear this shit up so that I can stop misleading my readers, teaching them to drink out of plastic BRIDE goblets and shit. Be thankful this retail store saved your ass, think how red your face would be drinking green Coors light OUT OF THE WRONG GLASS LOL

YOU ARE WELCOME

Now I know someone will invariably object “Hey this post is completely fucked, the nice people at RedEnvelope were just trying to reach out to you and give you some free information for your users.” That would be a salient point if it weren’t completely fucking wrong. Redenvelope doesn’t give a fuck about DDB, its readers or otherwise. In fact, this same entity reached out to several other beer blogs indiscriminately with the same “HI BLOG TEAM!” introductory line, with zero fucks to give about the sites they are reaching out to. I wouldn’t care so much about blatant spam but the second line proudly declares “WE LOVE THE WORK YOU ARE DOING ON YOUR BLOG. WE ARE BIG FANS!” That’s funny, because I have never received a single referral link from their retail website, and they certainly must be big fans of a shitload of beer blogs if the number of people who received this same email is any indication.

Furthermore, if RedEnvelope were actually a fan of DDB, they would know just how much my readers would appreciate such an infographic. These are the same type of degenerates who drink barleywines out of flower pots. As if that weren’t enough, I posted this photo

Redenvelope #1 DDB fan

and they clearly still did not look at the site and still were on board for letting me advertise their wares on my site. Super stoked for the ill-gotten free traffic.

So as promised, go here and buy some generic glassware from my #1 fan, RedEnvelope: http://www.redenvelope.com/beer-gifts-RBEER