Sure Monkish. Sure Treehouse. But what about when you’re in the middle of fucking nowhere and Lagunitas saves the day by being the only accessible hops that aren’t garbage tier unlaundered macro water?

That’s what they are there for. Camping trips. Boating excursions. Drinking in a movie theater. Tolerating your relatives with multiple beer runs to the grocery store.

Lagunitas remembers.

Getting crazy Hegelian notes out of this, triple layered dialectical tones. Heavy on the synthesis 

Monkish gave one hour notice on Wednesday at 3pm that people could buy a single four pack of TIPA: Biggie Biggie Biggie.

Thirty minutes later, three hundred and twelve (312) people were already in line. It’s like spec’ing a mage class to be able to summon unfamiliars, DPS to your alcohol license.
The people working at monkish stated that there are now people lining up on Tuesdays “for no reason.” Literally when they are closed, in hopes of  the silent announcement of a can release. Honestly I can’t provide a satirical verve on this when the reality of the current beer scene is self parodic.

Add some FFXV or 21 Savage references. This is too depressing to hitch a Narrative to.

People were seed pissed when Bruery discontinued Humulus Lager last year, arguably one of their most celebrated draft only gems. To replace those massive Lupulin boots, they now have new quarterly hoppy offerings that will rotate in a manner not inconsistent with Monkish marketing.

But can this brewery who shines in massive beers and complex acidic bangers reground itself in simple hoppy roots? Let’s find out.

I am reticent to even review Bruery wares because I have to field waves of wince inducing bullshit from landlocked dipshits decrying homerism or whatever else. It’s honestly not even worth it at a certain point, but these new treads aren’t the same ultra attenuative Belgian riffs you have seen those Placentia bois roll out so many times before.

On the left is hoppy obligation, a draft only pale ale which has to be mapped Conan yeast over a dialed in structure. It’s as though they want the Neipa experience but don’t have the conscience to go full Tired Hands with turbidity as the drop is relatively clean for the style and the swallow is intensely clean. Which might even be a neg in the hoof hearted turkey gravy marketplace we currently inhabit. This beer is all late addition hops: the bittering is so god damn gentle and pangs of Noble in the boil and motueka lemon lime in the whirlpool. 

It is intensely crushable and a page far removed from their hulking shadow of the colossus Melanges or their intense lactose goliaths. I want more of this. More small, simple, clean and focused. It’s a refreshing riff outside the lines of what I usually associate the Bruery canon.

Off the Prop is a pilot system beer that is also tasty but less remarkable in the clinical sense, I have less remarks. It isn’t as hazy or TIGGER WORD SO JUIIIIIICYYYYY. It still delivers cut melon and tangerine with a phlox/arugula swallow.  Again, well outside the scope of the other table beer riffs that the Bruery rolls out. The likes of Jardiner seek to hit Avril but this new project is something else altogether. Baby Treehouse? Sapling shack?

Only locals will drink this and no one will actively trade for a Bruery hoppy beer so the orange curtain will drop fully. Chances are you should have a fresh london ale III riff near you anyway, so why give a fuck about canwalez? You can barely subsidize your self esteem with hardly rare hopbombs, if you can’t grist out some sense of self worth by opening rare bottles for strangers then is the beer even that good think about it 

DDB is such a low priority to me at this point that I am totally fine with trudging through alligator mantears of bias accusations. This baby haze is still a hot creamsicle load in my belly button, no Backpage account needed.

The tome roulette paid off hard with this bottle, gorgeous unseen orange tones with crackly carb. Bottle was a lil stringy with probiotic sea monkeys but let it sit and chill and it poured beautifully. Crisp Anjou pear and jazz apple, construction paper, and raked leaves round out the delicious and satisfying ghost sesh

Most DDB readers only get ghosted in the DM.

Only real1’s know about that b3

Also, not up for debate, AD remains one of the GOaT: slept on in a criminal fashion

Guess what: the brewery that practically sets the standard for non-barrel aged stouts just made another phenomenal naturally aspirated stout and added some shit to it.

I’ll give you a moment to get up as your undoubtedly just fell out of your chair in shock. The neurotically dialed in and gluten reduced profile of their base stout has the addition of the beer game konami code: mostra coffee. That shit is hardly fair. It’s not to say the base beer isn’t well crafted but adding mostra takes even normal shit to orbital laser bean intensity.

Imagine having to explain to a little kid what a 1996 Toyota Supra is.

The bean grinding doesn’t stop there because of fucking course there is vanilla here. Why wouldn’t there be some sticky coldstone pageantry attendant to this vanilla latte. The waffle cone attempts to roll its oily foreskin over the delicious (Ethiopian?) roasted profile and the finish is so long and pumpernickel with a rye bread swallow that keeps the beany space docking perpetually red vining.

This never feels sugary or forced nor does it shellac its shitty parts and putty in the imperfections with coffee. This is a solid base beer that modded itself almost unfairly. It’s like a grounded cool person who is attractive without anxiety or significant psychological pathology. It’s like pick a struggle, FUCK u.

Do you like the coffee flavor frap? The one that’s all toasty and no bullshit sugar, then here you go. The vanilla is present but doesn’t dominate the conversation like an imposing Jewish aunt, beginning every sentence with “well what youNEEDTODOIS”

It’s just god damn delicious and this brewery, albeit questinably one note at this point [fn1], sets the gold standard for non ba adjunct stouts at this point, dudes who traded hard for a solidly mediocre mdb3 look sorry as fuck for overlooking this gem.

[fn1] abnormal makes awesome iPas but I can only dole out a certain amount of praise for a west coast brewery without having to field waves of pussyhurt homerism accusations from landlocked dumbfucks. 

That foraged twine putting the pnw to shame. Love this super saison classic. If you haven’t ticked this old staple then get on it. Gooby pls

There are Whaley alternatives that are moderately better but, come on. The mild qualms about body and residual cling are assuaged easily with how vibrant and coffeemate the tones are. Nutella and waffle cone overload, and the cost of entry makes having a FedEx account downright embarrassing.  

It is oily and slick in an adjunct imperfect way but it radiates this charm like a sloppy SG solo by way of Cycle shredding. I know judging objective pleasure based on price of entry is some gauche shit but, GFY, this beer is good and some st Archer tier accessible.

The state that invented cat fishing just lures and ropeadopes beer nerds hard. Stoked to watch bbpt5 and the Kuhnhenn solstice beers to swing well below their weight class.

If you recall, I reviewed this beer last year against Ale Smith reforged and while delicious, my main gripes was that the barleywine aspects were dominated by a stout hand and that the mouthfeel was a touch too close to that Central Waters wafer thin scherzo.

Imagine my trepidation when they noted this new one was coming out with parts aged twice as long, up to 24 months. I expected a weaker body and some shop class gone awry lacquer. Welp, it feels good to be wrong.

With increased aging the oak integrated to tame the sweeter stout and roast aspects and the barleywine Phoenix emerged from its 5 hour boil dripping in sticky caramel toffee goodness. The body is by no means some saccharine Cigar City fest but it feels softer and more rounded in a European execution. Almond and prailine work seamlessly with Mr. goodbar tobacco tones. You can kill the entire 500ml in the same grocery store you bought it at. Same trip. Kids ubering home.

People get pissed when I give praise to this brewery and gnash their San Diegan mandibles about ownership status and their barrel program continues to push them directly on the collarbone. Sitting down is the position of compelled malty compliance. What’s a DDB to subbydoo when the beer is legit delicious, not excessively priced, readily available and without stupid release pageantry? If anything, fuck that brewery for giving me nothing to talk about.

The ultra casking came out marvelous and didn’t wipe out the body, it improved it. There’s nothing funny about that. 

If you like the FW anniversary series, this will be right in your wheelhouse. Firestone is owned by Gulden Draak or Piraat or something and no one ever gives me shit for praising them. Phenomenal barrel aged beers component blended with care, spillin off the shelves at Walgreens.