I mean srs tho. This is out of control.
Wisconsin ale IED hit me hard.
Author Archives: dontdrinkbeer
Back east Brewery Palate Malate, Awesome album, mediocre dipa.
Malty, resinous and piney like them east coast Dipas from the late 2000s that Tired Hands and co have been trying to eschew since.
Old habits die hard and this is essentially a riff on oracle. If you dig that sort of underwhelming bag of yard trimmings.
Corti Brothers 7 year bourbon, I’ve switched from rum to whiskey. Bang bang.
What a strange beast we have here. This isn’t quite bourbon, but the secondary cask finishing makes it seen like a tawny port or a sweet scotch. The nose is kettle corn, brown sugar, Carmelized pear and odd touches of peat.
The taste is smokey, tannic of American oak, char, sweet vinous character like young cognac, a mellow heat that lingers into a pine and cort of firewood resonating like a scotch. It is admittedly an odd hybrid and nothing about this screams bourbon or even a corn mash at all.
It is complex and decadent and unlike anything else I have tried, a perfect bridge for people well versed in other spirits looking askew upon the bourbon world.
Solid box, the Papillon vintage is 2012.
2004 tomme Arthur Saisons,
Dat sweater doe
Go Corti, it’s your birfday, we gonna party like it’s a bourbon berfday.
Stoked for this one.
@alchemistbeer Focal Banger: Better than Heady. I know this will rustle people with Certified BJ palates.
Whoa, whoa, let’s put the pitchforks down and extinguish those torches. BOTH BEERS ARE WORLD CLASS. Focal Banger just goes hard and crushes it out of the park in a totally different and admittedly superior manner almost across the board. Let’s start oiling those cones and get back to them entry level hoppy palate roots in today’s roots.
Gemini, Focal’s Majesty
Focal Banger
The Alchemist
Vermont, United States
Style | ABV
American IPA | 7.00% ABV
WE DOING HOPPY BEER REVIEWS WITH A FULL NARRATIVE TOO, can you Digglett?
A: This has that same turbid, milky, Sunny D meets Tampico sort of radiance that the Cicerone schools gnash their teeth over: SUCH A LACK OF CLARITY. This was to be expected, as the farmhouse game is pervasive and not everyone subscribes to the crystal clear SRM of generations past. That’s chill. The carb is ample but doesn’t get in the way with excessive head or entendres connected thereto. It reminds me of how HF Double Galaxy Looks, except this shit only gots one galaxy, NEED TO UP THAT GALAXY COUNT SON.
S: This is an earth shattering limit break of olfactory delights, I am left mashing X to execute an ever expanding combo. There is of course the Citra aspects of tangerine and grapefruit zest, sure like you didn’t expect that, but HOLD UP, there is also a sort of Honeydew and a crisp watery melon profile that starts chopping up alpha rails real quick on a jewel case. This is overwhelming in scope and capacity but also adds depth to the old Bells’ hop overload formula. Balanced and excessive concurrently, a work of staggering brilliance.
You don’t always need to be massive to put in work. Str8 swole. Mad hoppy striations
T: The taste is intensely bright and nimble in a way that heady feels yeasty and sluggish by contrast. If Horny Tubbler is the Tank, this is a nimble rogue casting hoppy DPS all over the place. There is lemon cirtus, peach, apricot, a watery panache that buttresses and fires shots like Ocelot Revolver right into your bittering zones on the swallow. The intense citrus closes a touch minty and herbal with a bittering juniper mixing with the pithy juiciness. I can’t eke out punchlines when beers are this phenomenal, DDB just turns into one of those basic ticker 50 hits a day fan service pages. IT IS NOT MY FAULT.
M: This is more thin and malleable than Heady by a long shot and feels dynamic as a result, closer to Pupil or Nelson really, and those are exceptional ranks to shoulder. It sallies delicately from zone to zone on your palate and cascades crisp like an Anjou pear upon the swallow, like Deadpool backflipping and laying a trail of explosive citrus clusterbombs. UR MOUTH JUST GOT DOMED UP BY DEADPOOL.
pictured above: basic tickers become cicerones overnight after discovering hops
D: When asked how Michaelangelo created David, he replied “I looked at the marble and removed material until only David remained.” This does the same thing, except it strips down all the extraneous flabby water profiles, the excessive yeasty profiles, the overload od dry hopping, the needless crystal malt, excised honey and all the other bullshit and stripped this down like a roll-caged MR2 ready for the track. It is phenomenal without qualification and you are doing yourself a great disservice by skipping this one, even if it means dealing with rapacious Vermont traders who want Chez $4$ with cans of this, or whateverthefuck.
Narrative: Alfred Hopsdam clutched the radiant emerald amulet with trepidation as the train approached the platform, wisps of steam filling the air with wafts from the local orchards in the swing of harvest season. “Waterb…Waterburry…” Alfred stammered as he presented his entry forms to the elite Alpha Work Academy. The conductor glanced hurriedly at his pocketwatch and nodded, motioning for Alfred to pick up his forest green equipage and enter the cabin. The air inside of the Academy tram reeked of dabber oils, Jamba Juice smoothies, and herbal apertifs being decadently enjoyed by the senior members of the Hop Warriors Guild. One corpulent ranking official dropped his substantial mass onto the bench beside Alfred, “NAMES HOPSLAM, January class, BEEN AROUND HERE FOREVER, sayyyyy, you lookin a lil too thin to ride with us, you sure you on the right train bud? HAR HAR HAR!” His foul honey laden breath belied his true nature, sticky and coniferous. Alfred shook his head and gripped the amulet tightly and felt the clicking of the wheels onto adjoining rails as he watched the apricot trees buzz by with increasing celerity, he thought “they will see soon enough, I will show them all.”
PROTIP: Not everything needs to be barrel aged for you to give a fuck.
@alchemistbeer The Crusher, I ain’t a ticker I just crush a lot, DDB still got what u lookin 4
Finally getting around to knocking out these BA top 250 hoppy holes. Those ticks are always ephemeral will O wisps that dematerialize as soon as you see them. If you don’t believe me , go try and land a fresh growler of fuzzy baby ducks. I STILL HAVENT TICKED THEM DUXXX!!!!
This is in the same vein, those Vermont ballers who wear regal imperial purple robes and unabashedly demand sub 1000 count brewery only beers really push the limits of anal fissures in trades.
But is it worth it tho?
In a word, yes. In a few words, if you don’t have a world class borderline TIPA at your disposal. The appearance is beautiful in a nonstandard/BJCP disqualifying manner. It is radiant orange and turbid with frothy carb like that lemon merengue she asked you to pour on your nips that one time.
The nose is resinous and sticky in a grapefruit garnish with a tangerine pith like them lil Cuties in the bag. It is a bit hefty with a honey and light crystal aspect to the nose. Kinda like if you did weight reduction and roll caging to Hopslam. No more doughy tipa, this is an overstated but substantial dipa that may seem a bit off kilter but still alluring.
The taste has less sweetness and is better for it. It isn’t exceedingly original in the fruit and tropical aspects, but the mouthfeel is sticky and has a fresh cut lumber aspect of earthy woody bitterness, that actually is awesome. It provides a layer of depth to what would otherwise be a Knee Deep offering.
I prefer heady but this is the XL version that seems to be a touch out of step with refreshment but adds a depth so you give it a sly nod and let it date your daughter despite its clear girth.
If you can cut a decent deal, by all means get this massive dipa. The average person though, it’s tough to bite the horse bit and have your leg sawed off at the knee for what Vermont traders demand for these limited cans.
Really dro, but not straight drop uncut like Ephraim et al.
Getting torn up, orbital strike style
Ready for crushin n bangin. LOL LITRALLY!!
Thanks for the donation Coldafpipes.
Proceed to crushing.
I voted to discontinue State funding for the Technodrome. The underground drilling is just too costly:
With almost no exceptions, Jester kings offerings across the board remain intensely drinkable and delicious. This batch 12 of Petite Prince may have a punitive price point for what is essentially a second runnings table beer, but if you can overlook the economics of things, you have a very refreshing 2.9% crusher.
Michelob ultra is getting shit on when this is like 80 calories a pour and tastes infinitely better. All the farmhouse with a touch of lemon and no heft or grist to the body. Sometimes you want that watery saison closer, like when you reach for Avril, limitlessly laudable and pairable.
Don’t blame me I voted for General KRAGG
Balls bleak nut. U guise Things are getting realy out of hand at the creme factory .
Expedition with one year on it is better. There I said it.
dontdrinkbeer 