“When are you selling those DDB bullet openers?” FUKN go buy it yourself.

I have had to field questions about this opener left and right:

alm2

It’s a 100%% AMERICAN .50cal bullet fashioned into a bottle opener.  No, I am not selling them. You can go here and fucking buy one yourself, no DDB interloping needed.

The engraving is free so you can make it say “testiculus” or “autoeroticasphyxiation” or “Fund Planned Parenthood” or whatever you want.

HOT REVIEW:

The good: it’s a fucking bottle opener. It opens bottles. If it fails at that, then back to the drawing board.  It comes in a lil crown royal sack so your husky manchild associates will get worked up when you unsheathe it, rolling them folds back over the casing slowly.

the bad: probably cant take this shit on like airplanes? It’s heavy and things could get out of hand in the bedroom.  The lip on the opener is too fucking small for waxed bottles. But a bullet with a bayonet on it seems pretty fucking overboard.

Sure there are other companies that might make these, but only Lucky Shot USA sent me this one for free, so go buy one. OH wait WARNING OSTENSIBLY SPONSORED CONTENT. like you give a shit.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s