I try not to pander with abject hyperbole but, honestly, try to name another beer that is 1) canned and 2) as compelling as Sebago barleywine. 
 At this point someone will undoubtedly mention like BA ten Fidy or some treehouse shit, but let’s return to reality. In what realm do you exist where a barrel aged, multifaceted malt bomb is presented in aluminum confines? Even finding a barleywine in a can at all is remarkable, but to add layers of nougat and oaky depth, coupled with residual herbaciousness from faded hops and a baker’s cocoa closer: this is apeshit.

I wanted to include this in the old BLIND Ba barleywine shootout but didn’t have one on hand. This is a criminally overlooked gem that hovers somewhere in between Sucaba blended with Ba behemoth. Considering the latter sells for a comical $40.00/750ml, they could charge $12 a can for this and I would still be on board. 

The depth of the barrel is structured with a sweet but lightly bitter malty magnum/warrior type of fade. It’s a 2 guard on the sides but a blast of barrel driven length up top. 

I constantly count my blessings that the cadres of dessert stout dipshits have yet to unearth the majesty of old ales and barleywines, because that is the last thing this segment needs. I hope they continue to trade low and enjoy the sweet shade of less complex giants. I will sip Great with contempt and nod at the uninitiated in the rank and file plight, for they enlisted in a battle of brownie batter and candy aisle bullshit. Those who silently secret away bottles of Bbomb will rip their cap knowingly to Sebago and keep the tenants of this underground society within a clandestine lapel. 

If nothing else, buy a ton of these and take them out on the lake. Shit will get real very fast.

  
Stoked to see what David is up to after his studying at the now defunct Blue Lobster.

Can he rival their classic White Mountain Wheat? The bar has been set so high.

  
One of those nights.

  
I have a soft spot for a well made dorty. It is low key the best beer that Short’s makes, the Great Lakes version slays as well, and this might be the best I have ever had.

If you’re n00bing it hard, Moonlight brewing is not the meadery and actually they have been embroiled in a trademark dispute with those haters for a few years now. These are the Bay Area ballers that made the best Pilsner of all time: Reality Czech. I am not kidding. So if comes as no surprise that this dorty just crushes on many levels.

Aside from being beautiful with those brassy amber “petrified mosquito” Jurassic park tones, the nose is a gentle and subtle massaging of cut lawn grassiness and a cornbread sweetness that never swerves into the DMS lane. There’s a light minerality to the end of the nose like pumice that lets you know ur gonna drill this up in ur mouth no Novocain.

 
The taste is exceedingly refreshing with a watery mouthfeel, light bittnerness and fast swallow that makes pilsners seem hefty by contrast. The faintly herbal aspects make a dryness to the swallow the warrants another sip. The middle body of this beer has a light ritz cracker sweetness to it and you could drink gallons of this without pause.

In a world obsessed with barrel aged everything, 1.040 FG and ph 3.0, this is a marvelous example of how hard it is to tread with nuance and subtle intent. Moonlight thrives in this zone and brews like they have come straight from 1993.

Because they did.

  
Double Fuzzy Baby ducks and some custom Final Fantasy Six merch. What a time to be alive.

But what about the beer? This isn’t some manga stroke fest, if you want some 16 bit fap material this site will just make it take longer.

So on the face of things, abv, ibu, ICU, maltCU’s: this looks nominally double. It’s like if someone referred to their Camry as a DOUBLE COROLLA. Further damning is the fact that regular ass Fuzzy Baby Ducks is already so so so good. So why even bother with the QUASIDOUBLE? Well if you didn’t like the Societe-esque wiped out body of the original, this has a touch more of a two row ritz sweetness but nothing like the OG east coast malt bombs, just more “structure” if I were to cop some Som jargon.

The nose is intense in the realm of trillium’s finest and this beer stomps [politically correct]Bot to a degree that makes you wonder why this isn’t NeBco’s standard offering. It is lovingly danky but not to an off putting degree, the line between fragrant garlic and fresh kale is a good delineation for this boundary. Lemongrass and tangerine pith make this a weird hybrid between Kern Citra and prebuyout Nelson. If you have had both you know how hard this makes your hoppy uterial lining shed.

  
The taste has a heft that I don’t enjoy as much as the regular duck tales. It’s a weird trade off like when you spec a character in western RPGs or I guess MADDEN CREATE A PLAYER if you need hand holding. Both are totally equal and completely exceptional. I might give it to the original by a hair for sheer scary drinkability but these are easily amongst the best in their respective styles.

If you enjoy a lightly syrupy mouthfeel, a blast of chinook, simcoe (?) Amarillo (?) and citra, then you will love this. I hate even trying to identify the hop blends because there’s always some dipshit who points out the “errors” in a flavor profile. Chard and ruby red grapefruit with some arugula underpinnings, there you fucking go.

  
No one will even try to trade for this. Why do I even bother? Oh bother.

  
They be like DDB THO WHY ALL UR WINDOWS TINTED ON THE TAHOE

How in the hell is the pnw keeping this under wraps? Is this an isolated instance of a mind blowing bottle or are efforts that concentrated to keep anyone from finding out about this berry skin gem?

It is bone dry and intensely clean, toes the line of intense acidity but never tumbles over like an exceptional capture the flag defender. The berry is not present in the aesthetic but god damn it is a golden currant and raspberry that almost swallows with a tannic blast like a Pinot Grigio.

Very well done, RESPEKK ENINE WHEN U PLAYIN WIT THEY NAME

  
In Noe’s name. Deliver other baby palates not into temptation.

  
It’s almost like…too much hops.

If that’s a thing.

  
Like Mya and Silkk the Shocker, I’ll be movin on.