Such due diligence

Much consumer confusion

Wow

Ddb got those culturally intensive fans.

Clean hard water profile with a mineral aspect and chocolate that washes away with zero cling

Tastes like a roasty dr pepper and a sort of chalky finish. Would bang again

I paired it with smoked salmon.

Your butthole will pucker when that champagne oxy cap pops upon opening. This pours with massive carb and that billowing logsdon attenuation, like sloppy tittes when that underwire is breached. The cloudy golden and brassy hues are beautiful and don’t need your gelatin cold crashing, god made BdG like this and who are you to demand sick clarity?

Nose is crisp pear, lemongrass, biscuity goodness and some of the clove and banana you’d expect from the yeast strain. The taste is like a BFM saison or something from Vapeur with that hard water profile, clean esters, cornbread and honey merging with an expansive grassy herbal finish. Just destroyable and meant for these warm days in Colorado where people are currently getting hailed on during firestorms. THOT shit, ultra ratchet

This is likely sitting under a layer of dust at your bottle shop and you probably passed it up 3 years ago when it was imported, do yourself a favor and start taking BCAAs and do some real farmhouse sets. None of this Red Barn elliptical shit, real lifting, engage your core and go hit those green bottles like it means something. You walk past Sans Culottes all the time and girls don’t respect you, time to warm on those rustic hands and them saison quads with a farmers carry.

This is an excellent beer, but for $10 my readers would still rather buy some fruited stout or some shit. Prometheus can only slang so many DuPont strains.

Here is a beer that no one is ISO, so you actually have to buy it and drink it. Oh fuuuuuu-

Alright so as a shameless Bruery apologist, you probably think I am going to come out servicing this 510 glory hole and giving them Rare Barrel boys sloppy dome shots. DDB HAS JOURNALISTIC INTEGRITY OKAY.

So these Berkeley bad bitches have been turning out a litany of sours, producing fancy ass ceramic growlers, and keeping their ranks tight with a cellar society: BUT WHAT DO THEIR BEERS FUCKING TASTE LIKE? If your dickhead answer is “prolly like the Bruery LOL !!1!!” Welllll you wouldn’t be wrong, but you wouldn’t know what you are talking about either. Let’s push deeper inside this tart cervix.

This beer pours with a wispy carbonation that crackles and resides quickly with little cling or residual proteins in the glass. If you drink American wild ales expecting mad lacing, well, good luck with that. The color looks like a brown ale base was used and adopts this chocolate meets violet hue that isn’t as beautiful as say them fruited goldens you stroke it to, but pretty in its own way, like Maya Rudolph.

The smell at cold temps is acidic, blackberry, acetic, sour black cherry tannins, and at warmer temps the fruit and vinous profile is more akin to a big dry oaky Sonoma cab. Not a huge bouquet of musk, but it’s largely because the acidic profile is doing sick burn outs and hitting on your sister, not much room for anything else on that stage.

The taste is intensely acidic with an oaky dryness akin to Otiose if you even remember that beer you negligent asshole. You get a touch of cranberry, raspberry, light chocolate and fig, and it closes with a resonant acidic character that resounds gracefully. If Consecration is the 7 series, consider this the 3, except less Persian. The lip smacking dryness leaves the tannins from the wine profile but none of the fruity smuckers fun, them sugars were well metabolized. This is highly drinkable due to the abv and it’s clean sharp finish, like when you eat hot Cheetos and you feel the sting that begs for another taste.

Overall, this is a less substantial version of say, Otiose, but it stands on it’s own due to the light execution and acidic interplay. The path of dark sours is a rough road indeed, but this fares the journey with calm poise and enamel raping panache.

Every night is Friday night if you are perpetually swerved

The fuck do I even know about cider

I cook carnitas in Angry Orchard.

This rustic gem made with authentic Lake Michigan water is more of a biere de pays meets table saison with that clean sub 5% abv trill, however, it still goes in with a nice dry mouthfeel like fruit strip gum yellow flavor, clove, banana, a lemon grass pinch to it and a lightly herbal (saaZ?) closer. Highly crushable and EVEN THE XX CHROMOSOMAL ORDER COULD DRINK THIS WHAT WITH THEIR BACKWARDS PALATES AND INSIDE OUT genitals.

But srs, highly crushable if not lacking in complexity. It does what it sets out to do: bone your super hot cousin that is off limits to you.

Also succeeds at being a clean wispy tiny dancer of a saison. Think Jester King Das wunderkind type of shit with lower ferm temps.

Who even reads this site anymore fuck

It’s probably just Backfat any way

My baby palate is not qualified to address a bourbon of this quality. It is like angels envy with a cinnamon and a wafty caramel like creme brûlée crust.

Srs tho you can’t trust my opinions outside of beer

You can’t trust them within beer either

This is exceedingly tasty, not overly sweet, not overtly smoky, makes the Campfire stout from high water look like a KIA to this Infiniti level shit.

It is attenuated down to a manageable level with a clean slick mouthfeel that resonates with a toastiness, them Grammy grams provide a grittiness to the mouthfeel and a touch of breadiness.

This begs for a rum or cognac treatment, the mallowfoam notes need to be ratcheted back with some barrel. Plus this brewer probably hates DDB so there’s also that.

This beer is the closest approximation to Ann’s perfect Carbonation. If nothing else this gentle crackle of those microbead Dove bubbles just send wafts of apricot and peach rings, French oak, peach jolly ranchers, and Riesling grapes. I came into this with Vermontoise expectations and holy fuck this is way, way beyond that. This is better than E and just a step below art and Ann. Intensely drinkable, huge citrus flavor profile and wait for this: AN AMERICAN SAISON THAT ISNT JUST LACTIC SINGLE CULTURE ACIDITY. There is legit musk and leather like a Jansport left in the rain.

There is a lime finish that is dry and lingers like vintage Mid 2000s Printemps. It is absolutely phenomenal and without a direct analog of recent memory. This synthesis of Belgian musk and complexity with the brightness of American execution is what Vermontoise should have been, a flawless dance across the Atlantic.

As a final note, the unfermentable tannins from the buckwheat contributes a protein creaminess with that soapy carb that slays. If you blended saison d’erpeteau with art, you would have an inferior version of this excellent farmhouse ale.

I shouldn’t have to write you a narrative to summarize the foregoing. Do what you know you need to do. Don’t miss this shit. If you do I will ravage all that come across my grasp.

Also don’t tell anyone about this. Pls. Srs.