Pulpit Rock Brewing Barrel Aged Sticker Shock is Excessive in the Best Way

That teensy glass is flawless

This beer is a condensed experience. The flavors themselves are so compacted and concentrated that it exaggerates every aspect that it sets forth. New palates thrive on these experiences. The joy of having posted 14 types of Sunny D IPAs to your timeline and then hitting an eyedropper pour of something like this: it is an adolescent tongue shedding its husk.

Look at the uninhibited joy when they read the ingredients aloud to the disinterested masses. “COCONUT….I GET COCONUT!” waves of saccharine ochre coating the bicuspids, the air is redolent of the oft recited candy bars “ALMONDY JOY, MOUNDS, SAMOA COOKIES.”  The recitation is confirmation. The act is the ritual. 

The almond and cacao profile almost mute the barrel but it plays DPS support. New money thrives on these endeavors because it mirrors things that have already had. It is the familiar. The Brazzers tab left half finished, a coconut narrative unbusted. A director inserting shots to hold the audience’s hand. It is condensed discovery.

The people who create actual sticker shock thrive on this condensation. These beers are so rich, they are meant to be shared even in small format. The sharing is the ritual, the groupmind, the nodding and 4.8 being entered in untapped. The review is condensed, the pour is small, the experience is distilled into “THICC.”

Perceived viscosity is goal number one

I love this beer more than Caucasian boomers love tucking t-shirts into jeans. It delivers in an exaggerated way the fudgy, flaked macaroon and Nesquik promises it sets forth. The problem is restraint and intensity. There’s no “straight beer” to play off of. It is all coconut gags, almond pratfalls, shots to the cocoa nibs. Without resting the game, the intensity has the droning effect of listening to 160bpm Drum and Bass music that makes you tired. This is intentional. Drink less, distill the endeavor.

Look at the thimble pours on Untappd and the succinct reviews, everything about this beer is highly articulate chocolate shouting. People who don’t know beer will love this because it mirrors dessert, something they feel confident discussing. It’s a very well done beer that is best shared with 15 strangers in a backyard.

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