Funky Buddha Snowed In, twisted on that flaky white: FL bath salts engage

I had reservations going into this one despite the unquestionable quality of Last Snow. You see, funky Buddha has become the Hill Farmstead of weird Short’s food beers and that isn’t always what my aching coconuts require to release that sweet milk. This however, is incredible.

My candy sweats never onset in a meaningful way because the beer itself never trips over its own dick: it is first and foremost an incredible imperial porter and the adjunct MODIFY the experience. Usually the whole affair is the ass over teakettle the other way around, not this time, the excellence is established at the outset.

The sheeting is flawless and the billowing khaki carb is a 600 thread count uprising for your eyes and gum line. Two back to back favorable reviews makes it look like my palate needs viagra to stiffen up to these old overbearing dark beers, but I assure you, I am still doing naked diamond push ups in my one man cell. 

The taste never goes overboard or is some glade plug in coconut bullshit. It is seamlessly integrated into the body like that yellow jumpsuit from Kill Bill. The blade is lowered when the fruit ninja slices the barrel in half. The barrel treatment is so so subtle and doesn’t go oaky or adopt a lacquer bomb. It’s so, so fun to pander out new Florida imagery and craft new imagery to sleight their residents but, I can’t, this beer is redeeming in a manner that the populace is inversely disappointing.

Some people accuse me of an exclusivity embrace, that connection to a niche reader base who pressed their nips to the glass of my cell, because they served their nickels as well. 1 per person, 600 bottles or not, this is so well done. It is an explosion of cascading whoppers, almond joy, hangover coconut water, stripper dust (flowerbomb perfume?) coupled with brownies and macaroons.

The whole time I was twisting my pubes into long Predator dreads trying to decide if this outperforms Nooner8. It’s so hard to decide because this has balance and force like a Ducati monster, hardly usable in any realistic setting. But nooner8 is a ridiculous hayabusa that you full throttle to attract Bolivian women. Don’t make me choose.

Tl;dr Florida continues to do the Ba stout/porter game so so well.


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