LA BEER WEEK CONTINUES: DDB visits @threeweavers obtains no weaves, steadfastly remains unwoven @labeerweek

Three Weavers, for those instances when two weavers just isn’t quite enough.  These rascals in Inglewood have not been up to no good, they are doing at least some good, if not significant good.  They opened their doors about 8 months ago and have been slowly ekeing out a very significant market share in an area that was seemingly at its saturation point with upstart breweries, with a whole smattering opening within 2 years of one another.  This is a place that is a standout in focus and execution, worthy of your time and attention.

It feels like if a Burning Man bookstore merged with Pizza Port

It feels like if a Burning Man bookstore merged with Pizza Port

First and foremost, I liked this place because they were one of the only breweries that wasn’t chickenshit or self serving enough to disallow growlers from other places (provided the label is obscured.) Most new breweries just dont even bother with it because HEY THESE PEWTER HANDLED $40 BAVARIAN GROWLERS WONT MOVE THEMSELVES.  Secondly, their whole ethos is this stripped down simplicity in execution akin to Julian Shrago at Beachwood.  They offer clean, highly attenuated riffs on existing styles and dont go like putting Crunchberries in a fucking Dortmunder to draw unwarranted attention to themselves.

When I first heard about Three Weavers, I thought it was an urban hair salon.  That isn’t an Inglewood joke, it is a hairstyling joke.  But SRS they seem to provide a valuable new riff on a perpetually evolving area.  The tasting room is a smattering of all demographics and it is in equal measure industrial and an artsy Birkenstock Lillith Fair extravaganza at the same time.  For some reason, whenever someone previously would mention this place, it was always brought up immediately with PINK BOOTS SOCIETY noted in the same sentence.  I mean sure they do Pink Boots events,have a Pink Boots societe beer on tap, they have a female head brewer, but you’d have to be a myopic shitlord if all you focused on was the fact that head brewmaster Alexandra Nowell was female.  There is more to this brewery, but that appears to be a big part of it.

I don't know what is a shittier move, taking candids or asking a server to pose in front of the taplist.  Both are equally inconvenient and selfish

I don’t know what is a shittier move, taking candids or asking a server to pose in front of the taplist. Both are equally inconvenient and selfish

Alright, but enough gladhanding bullshit about COMMUNITY and FERMENTATION INTEGRITY, how does the fucking beer taste?

Seafarer Kolsch: this god damn style: easy to do, hard to fuck up, even harder to do well.  They fall closer to the exceptional pin with what should be a glossed over entry, clean delicious and crisp like an anjou pear with a touch of grassiness.  It reminds me of Reality Czech and those gentle as shit offerings from Moonlight Brewing, which is to say it is very good.

We Saw Them Coming: I am pretty sure this is just a riff on 21st Amendment’s mediocre as fuck saison “SNEAK ATTACK” and then they added watermelon to it. However, unlike the 21A offering, this is intensely dry and the watermelon isn’t some crutch they lean on like with HELL OR HIGH WHATEVERMELON, it is olfactory first and contributes a touch of salinity to the finish.  As refreshing as an ice cube down your Lane Bryant stretchpants.

Return of Sassy Rye: This was meh, it was fine but if you went into this expecting some Nelson explosion of dry, oily hops, you’ll get more of a hoppy Roggenbier.  Shit is clean and well done, just not exceptionally exciting, like IN THE BEDROOM starring Sissy Spacek, but with more rye and less depressing.

Bonus points for not having a heavy, needlessly ornate, stupid fucking themed serving board of like an entire Loom or some shit

Bonus points for not having a heavy, needlessly ornate, stupid fucking themed serving board of like an entire Loom or some shit

Hounslow Porter:  This beer shiningly underscores their attention to detail and ability to craft dead on, to style, clean BJCP offerings much in the way that Great Lakes does in Ohio.  This is fantastic, full of chocolate, anise and a clean watery finish.  However, the average beer dipshit will want an 11% version of this with candy canes in it and complain how THEY DIDNT HAVE NOTHIN SPECIAL ON TAP.  Their simplicity is both their shining attribute and serves as a sleeper effect, somewhat discouraging deep contemplation for their more sessionable offerings.

Southbounder Coffee Stout: This got my sand dollar nips blasting like some Flintstones pushup Pops.  This had all of the dry and well massaged yeast profile of their other gentle offerings but a blast of intense acidity and roast from the coffee.  This is easily their best beer and fires on all cylinders.  I emptied my wastegate immediately, straight blowoff, fully boosted.

CHOOSE YOUR CLASS WISELY LOL like anyone even played shitty FFXIV

CHOOSE YOUR CLASS WISELY
LOL like anyone even played shitty FFXIV

Alright so there you have it: nuanced, gentle, sessionable beers that are well crafted without the cereal aisle and spice rack dumped into them.  None of the offerings will be a complete paradigm shift, but perhaps that shouldn’t always be the intent, maybe you should stop being such a judgmental asshole and sip on ESB. The staff knows their shit, the patrons are nice, and the contingency of beer assholes officiously bottlesharing on premises has yet to infect this place with their AXE Bodyspray musk.  Now is the time to visit.

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