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National Bohemian: the beer that lubricates Baltimore

People in Baltimore will not stfu about this Natty Bo. Before I came here I figured it was some Coors variant I had never encountered, Natural Light Bohemian aged in an Anthropologie store on vision boards. This beer goes back to post-Prohibition which means it’s an adjunct lager riding a colossal wave of nostalgia feels like the Ready Player One of bottom fermenters. No one could explain to me why the mascot only has one eye but given the rowdy Baltimore population I feel like self harm is attendant to natty BO sessions. The taste is firmly within experiences you have had many times before the nose and swallow is almost part and parcel identical to Miller Lite but the taste itself and mildly ritz meets change jar execution screams PBR. This makes sense as all of these Bo’s are made by Pabst in Milwaukee a thousand miles away, but 85% of these Nat King Bo’s is consumed in Baltimore. It is forced economics in a crazy way. Plus Pabst re-upped their contentious contract with Miller in 2014 so all the pieces slide together. This is a contextual experience that has buttressed many teenage pregnancies and Orioles public urination charges, and that’s fun. It’s an ambient beer to fill the crushing silence of Baltimore’s rain and the constant barrage of The Wire references. Growing up in Fresno, I know about a 650k city with no public transportation, unpleasant weather, crime, geographic self loathing, and being at odds with other more salacious cities, so Baltimore speaks to me on a fundamental level. Natty Bo is for my populace. The type who make their own fun like “Drinking Mario Party” and let the beer take a back seat. At least it isn’t @duclawbrewingco so thank god for that.

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Injured due to your own beer negligence? CALL DDB LAW TODAY

Have you or the person who owns the house you live under been hurt or injured by an exploding 450n can? Have you fallen victim to BBTb2 investment scams? Have you been on the receiving end of a shared toxic beer society membership you can’t get out of? Then you need DDB LAW. Here at DDB law we litigate all of the Beer Scene’s most complex and difficult issues. Has someone at a share called the hypewhale you brought “underwhelming” based on a 1oz pour that they didn’t contribute anything to help land it? You can sue them for that. Misappropriation of Untappd toasts? We will sue them. What about collusion between homer traders to drive up the cost of a 300 bottle release from a brewery no one has heard of? The Midwest is getting sued. We also offer services to hide and transfer cellar assets in the unlikely event that a beer nerd has somehow gotten married. Maybe you need to transfer title of your Side Project bottles into BTAC bourbon so you can clearly sell the bourbon and cash out? We offer Tick Ad Litem services to assist in the straw man transaction. Buy too many bottles you had no intention of drinking? We can restructure your Adjunctron bottles into a liquidity picture that is right for you. Here at DDB Law we know that actually drinking beer isn’t the goal, but maximizing self worth from bottles made by someone else absolutely is. We will fight corrupt trade groups and clear your name from Bad Trader lists if you repeatedly back out of trades to wait for something better. We have all been there and DDB Law is willing to fight for your shitlord rights. If you have broken your ankle negligently attending a beer release despite being told not to show up, DDB LAW will represent you interests. We can even show you how to file a FedEx insurance claim to reap even more profits. Here at DDB Law we know, life isn’t about enjoying beer, it’s about sharing 1oz pours of rare beer with strangers to glean feelings of self worth from their equally insincere gratitude. CALL DDB LAW TODAY.

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Westbound and Down Brewing Double Barrel Louie, exceptional balance in a svelte barleywine frame

On the eve of rauch Endgame might as well pop a double barrel barleywine from westbound and down brewing, YOURE FUCKIN OUT.

Idaho Springs [Stefan Yauchzee 🥔 points] Colorado. This beer is really good, so much depth and interplay between the port/peach bourbon aspect, vinous, figs, pruney dates but with a tight little old ale frame that gingerly releases the oaky clutch. It’s not a notchy bitter cask gearbox, if anything it’s almost too lithe in an Adam from the Wood sort of way. Really enjoyable if you like to tread the fruit leather path and eschew British confectionaries.

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Batch 45 of Malt Couture has horny zombies and baseball beers and birds and Pennsylvania bangers

Oh 🐦 🚨 Malt couture batch 45 is on draft. We open the new Gratitude, try some awesome PA beers, Sloh and PMG are infected with the umbrella virus. The old trickster Stephen brings in a beer 10 years in the making, we cover beer 🍻 baseball ⚾️ news! We follow up on @chihuahuacerveza with some digging into their production, and cover the Iron Triangle Brewing bankruptcy. After that spicy 🌶 drama we crack some god tier @voodoobrewery and @3sonsbrewingco juice and go full Pennsylvania mode. There’s also a horny zombie in this episode and he cannot be satiated. #zombies #beer #brewing #pa #podcast #comedy #craftbeer #rarebeer #sick

http://bit.ly/GermsAndGratitude

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New show announced a week from today: Goose Island Tolerates Malt Couture at the Clybourn Pub Live April 19, 2019!

Oh dang @maltcoutureddb is coming A WEEK FROM TODAY to contaminate the @gooseclybourn facility with live comedy, games, improv and some high octane blending. STEPHEN DRINKS LITERAL GASOLINE [not true] but this show is going to be rad and totally different from the 4/20 show. It’s $15 and you get a pour of 2018 propreeesh it should be an awesome time. Also if you are balling outrageous there is a VIP session that is extremely limited and we are bringing some awesome gems from the linen closet for an exclusive tiny share before the show. Put on your Zubaz shorts and finest trilby and join us 🤺link below! #podcast #comedy #craftbeer #chicago #beer


VIP link: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/malt-couture-vip-educational-bottle-share-at-the-goose-island-clybourn-brewhouse-tickets-59927428552

8pm Show: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/goose-island-tolerates-malt-couture-live-at-the-clybourn-brewhouse-tickets-60157895886

 

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Main and Mill Brewing Barrel Aged Jifforia is Excessive in the Most Nut Smashing Way Possible

This @mainandmillbrew BA Jifforia is the quintessential representation of one dimensional stout excess, in the best way possible. Usually the newest StL adjacent hypewater has The Who’s who of confectionary items like a Wakefieldian laundry list. In the way that every hazy has the same five hops listed in different orders, such is the case for innumerable tired entries in the Glucowater style: coconut coffee vanilla cocoa nib afterbirth. This beer throws the Coldstone out with the creamery and embraces a single Jiffy point to the halberd: nonstop peanut butter, shells to the wall. It has that heft and viscosity in the 1.060 FG that people have come to praise as a fakie kickflip in the brewing world. Ferms stalling out gets the new balances standing on pavement.

This somehow wrangles that massive presence and throws intent behind the hefty sheeting. This is a Reese’s driven thicccboi and the poise and stability is both crushing and creamy. I can allude to the milk chocolate and Nestle Quik aspects but let’s be absolutely clear: this is an all Skippy endeavor and there is room for little else. The nose is so unidimensionally peanut butter that is exists as a fixed point on a single axis. It reminds me of the milk left over from OOPS ALL PEANUTBUTTER CUPS, or whatever HFC cereal they are selling kids these days. The taste provides some butterfinger but the barrel is almost completely absent in this nut smashing performance. Its like when you see Warren Sapp being a powerful beast but also a hefty chungus just taking people out, you respect what has been accomplished. This makes @witchshatbrewingcompany Dragontraxxx seem downright refined by contrast and you would hard crunched to find a more expressive representation of this Chick o Stik offering. It is very enjoyable but in a way that makes you feel bad about yourself for consuming it. I sat in rapt shame when I finished the entire season of “Selling Sunset.” The consumption was a loss, yet edifying, concurrently. Thankfully this trades so high that is lends itself to 13 mouthbreather KILL SHOT shares with filthy festival glasses and pithy untappd reviews “STRAIGHT JIFFY BRUU”

Thanks to Will Amacher for helping me lock down this insane gem

#rarebeer #instabeer #beerreviews

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Batch 41 of Malt Couture: Fremont b3k, the Veil circle of wolves and a modelo tragedy

http://bit.ly/B3KBumpBumpBump

Batch 41 of @maltcoutureddb is on draft: @fremontbrewing b3k boy band juice, @theveilbrewing doubles down on the wolves, dystopian dog beer, and an absolute @modelousa tragedy occurs in East Los Angeles. RIP it’s not Modelo time. It’s a big batch with a lot to sip on, enjoy your malt couture as we slide into spring. BUMPBUMPBUMP. #barleywine #beer #craftbeer #memes #podcast #rarebeer