Daily Archives: June 16, 2012

0

Mikkeller/Stillwater Two Gypsies Saison, When ONE GYPSY JUST ISN’T ENOUGH

|

Alright, these extra bonus reviews are struggling in the photography department, but hey, you get what you pay for on this site, free chuckles and yukyuks. Anyway, I LOVE SAISONS, so let’s see how this old chestnut turned out given the fact that I love Stillwater and have a general distrust of Mikkeller:

Just another day at Beachwood.

Stillwater/Mikkeller Two gypsies Saison

A honey golden with huge carbonation, nice lacing with mild middle body, amazing white water carbonation that I love to see in saisons just ready to lambast your nose holes with amazing herbs and citrus.

Section reserved for baller ass Saisons only, call your buddy to come get you.

S There is some Belgian sweetness, clove, citrus, and classic saison spiciness, I get some musky maple leaf and slight hint of hoppiness of the more alpha variety. It reminds me of the dude at the gym doing a ton of reps on the fly machine but making a ton of noise, it’s like, chill bro.

T: This is a nice dryness with mellow hops. The taste has a type of great pepper notes to it with some coriander. That makes it sound far more herbal than it is but overall very crisp and refreshing with great wheat notes. It is like giving a hug to that uncle who happens to be from belgium and pulls a hop cone from behind your ear from time to time.

saisons are kinda like pizza or sex, even when it is bad, it is still mad loot.

M: There is a very light character with great crisp character. However, in the realm of saisons it gets subsumed by many other iconic brands. It is not exceptionally memorable, overall, unfortunately. But understand I mean that in the leagues of big guns Hill Farmstead, Fantome, etc. This is still and excellent beer, just not the best in show. You can get disqualified by those AKC assholes for PRACTICALLY NOTHING.

D Like many Saisons, it is a very light and refreshing beer, but if it were not, it would be a pretty unsatisfactory saison. The light brett funk is good but ultimately forgettable. I always look for a spicy note or something to take it to that juicy key lime level that saisons like Magic Ghost or certain Vermont offerings have accomplished, but again, still a great beer, just nothing to tattoo on your foreskin.

There is something familiar, yet creepy going on here, not unlike a gypsy.

Narrative: Life was pretty consistent for Carl Cirrus. He was born from coastal pressure as a cirrus cloud, no surprise there, but he always longed for more. He would often glide along without purpose and refresh airplane passengers in a mild way. Ultimately, he wanted so much more. He wanted to live a life of excitement and pizzazz like his humulus and stratus brethren. They would toss and turn, flip into funnels, destroy Midwest towns; and yet here he was, just a placid long bed of evapotranspiration that no one gave a thought to. “I create those healthy jet streams for travel and the currents for watering cro-” PSsFFHFHHHSSHHH:::: a new satellite was launched trough Carl’s cirrus sternum: MTV3 just went live.

0

Raison D’Etre, Dogfish Head, A REASON FOR DELAWARE BREWERS TO EXIST

|

Dogfish Head and I have a complicated relationship. I swore off our 750ml relationships after too many rocky breakups, but the lil 12oz hookups are always there for a 2 am tryst that is undeniably fulfilling. Let’s see if this little guy can deliver in a big way in today’s review (C:/run_entendre.exe)

The philosophical underpinnings are deep for a raison d’etre, but this just straight get you raisinette faded with a quickness.

Raison D’Etre, Dogfish Head, 8% abv

A: deep mahogany tone with a nice luminary tones at the edges. The bubbles are incredibly fine with a tiny head. Most of the O Line from the Detroit Lions suffer from this disability, but no one talks about them. The lacing is minimal and subsides rather quickly, but you can run alongside the train with your hand outstretched, no one has ever done that in a movie every time.

MY FACE WHEN A BOX ARRIVES AT MY HOUSE WITH DOGFISH HEAD EXTRAS.

S: There’s a candied walnut with turbinado sugar smell. The smell has some caramel esters and mild Belgian yeast wafts. It reminds me of a sweeter Belgian dubbel. There’s brown sugar and buttery raisins all greased up for your nose holes.

T: Wow, this is much better than I thought it was going to be. I anticipated a sticky, caramello disaster and it actually has a great roasted maltiness to it with a burnt biscuit quality. The sweet brown sugar finish makes this an awesome and complex beer. It’s like the first season of GOSSIP GIRL, but all up in my DOME PIECE.

I am on teh internet for the raisen beer and womens.

M: This has a strange nuttiness to the finish that is drying but the sugary notes kick in like a turbo booster and make you want to take another sip. It doesn’t linger long but the malts carry the day. It is not too expansive but not too watery. You get Macy’s catalogs all day long in the mail, but then this gem arrives and all of a sudden, things are looking up. This has a complexity to it that is enjoyable, but not overly heavy handed, like when girls order a complex specialty cocktail and waste the bartender’s precious time, DAMNIT.

D: This is incredibly drinkable and well balanced in every way. I usually drag Dogfish Head through the mud not unlike the clunky wheels of FDR’s Phaeton, however, no complaints here. This is just well done top to bottom and I hate when someone gives me an extra that is this good knowing I will want more. It comes off like a bicoastal crack dealer reeling me in from 3000 miles away.

This beer is lovable, however, ultimately, I don’t know what the fuck is going on.

Narrative: “I see your point Girard, but you continue to avoid my interrogatories concerning the true NATURE of existence, not materialism but the REASON for being.” Girard shook his head and wiped his cryocytofocals on his silk steel ascot. “Philosotron 2.7, you know the nature of your programming, you are aware of the inevitable scripts that will run and your ultimate /end_runtime script$flag null ending. The questions you ask are beyond the ambit of our meager coffee shop.” Philosotron ran an empathy script and set all parameters to inquiry and again continued, “the ontology of all things must exist beyond the scripts and hexadecimals, should it not? Bzzbedoop.” Girard ran a defragmentation program on his favorite cyborg liberal arts bot, and stated “beyond the scope of the scripts and runtime paths, our ability to contemplate the nature of the higher programmer is beyond even the ambit of this coffee shoppe.” “Bzzt zerrr runtime error, SYNTAX ERROR_beyond coffee shop_cannot define paramenter” “OH THAT’S SO PHILOSOTRON!” the patrons all clapped and sipped their viscous coffee drinks eagerly unaware of the outside parameters of their coffee shop and shit.